Managing Holiday Chaos with ADHD: Strategies for Juggling the Extra To-Do’s
Break Down the Big Tasks Into Small, Manageable Steps
When you’re looking at the long list of things to do during the holidays—buying gifts, decorating, cooking, sending cards, attending events—it’s easy to feel overwhelmed. ADHD often makes it harder to focus on large, complex tasks, and this can lead to procrastination or feeling paralyzed by the sheer volume of things to do.
Instead of focusing on the big picture, break each task into small, manageable steps. For example, instead of "buy all Christmas presents," try "write down gift ideas" or "order gifts for mom." This makes each task feel less daunting and gives you clear, achievable goals to work toward.
Tip: Use a task management tool like a to-do list app or even sticky notes to visually break down tasks. Checking off small tasks gives a sense of accomplishment, which is motivating!
Create a Holiday Calendar
With ADHD, it's easy for dates and deadlines to slip through the cracks—especially when it comes to time-sensitive holiday tasks like sending cards or baking cookies. One of the most helpful tools is a dedicated holiday calendar that includes everything from parties to project deadlines, gift buying, and even self-care reminders.
Consider using both digital and physical calendars (I personally love a printed month calendar that we can write all over and throw away later!) to keep yourself on track. A digital calendar can send you reminders (which can be especially helpful when you tend to forget important dates), while a physical calendar might allow you to visualize your schedule and plan your days accordingly.
Tip: Set up alerts and reminders 2–3 days in advance for important tasks like shipping gifts or confirming party RSVPs. You might need extra time to prepare, and advance notice gives you a buffer.
Embrace the Power of Prioritization
The holidays are full of competing priorities: shopping, attending events, cooking, and spending time with family. When everything feels urgent, it’s hard to know where to start. With ADHD, prioritizing tasks can help you focus on what really matters and avoid getting stuck in perfectionism or analysis paralysis.
Try a simple prioritization method like the "Eisenhower Matrix," which divides tasks into four categories:
Urgent and important
Not urgent but important
Urgent but not important
Neither urgent nor important
Focus first on the tasks that are both urgent and important. For example, if you need to buy a gift for someone whose birthday falls right before Christmas, that would be a "high priority" task. Once you've handled the essentials, move on to less pressing activities.
Tip: Remember that some tasks can be delegated or even skipped! If you’re overwhelmed, it’s okay to adjust your expectations for the holidays and let go of perfection.
Simplify Where You Can
Let’s face it: the holidays are a lot of work. And when you have ADHD, juggling multiple tasks while trying to maintain focus can become exhausting. If you’re already feeling stretched thin, it might be time to simplify certain aspects of your holiday routine.
Here are some ideas for simplifying common holiday tasks:
Gift Shopping: Set a budget and stick to it. Shop online to avoid the stress of crowded stores. Consider group gifts or experiences instead of individual items.
Decorating: Opt for simple, easy-to-put-up decorations that don’t require too much time or mental energy. Try an elegant, minimalist approach, or delegate decorating tasks to others if you can.
Holiday Meals: Instead of cooking every dish from scratch, consider prepping ahead of time or ordering certain items ready-made. Potluck-style gatherings can also reduce the pressure on you to do it all.
Tip: When in doubt, consider giving yourself permission to do less. Not everything has to be grandiose or perfect for the holidays to be meaningful.
Practice Time-Blocking
Time-blocking is a productivity technique that involves setting aside specific chunks of time to focus on particular tasks. When you have ADHD, staying on track can be difficult, but time-blocking provides structure and prevents tasks from dragging on indefinitely.
For example, you might block out two hours on a Saturday morning to shop for gifts, or 30 minutes every evening to wrap presents. During these times, you focus only on that specific task, without getting distracted by other things.
Tip: Be realistic about how much time tasks will take. It's easy to underestimate, especially with ADHD, so give yourself extra time for each activity to account for potential distractions.
Delegate and Ask for Help
You don’t have to do it all alone. The holiday season is about connection, and that includes sharing the load with others. Whether it's asking a family member to help decorate the house, having a friend join you for a shopping trip, or delegating certain tasks at work, don’t be afraid to reach out for support.
If you’re hosting a holiday gathering, consider delegating cooking tasks or asking guests to bring a dish. If you’re attending multiple parties or events, consider trimming down your schedule to prioritize the most important ones.
Tip: The holiday season is about enjoyment, not perfection. It’s okay to admit you need help—and others will likely be happy to pitch in.
Focus on Self-Care
With all the hustle and bustle of the holidays, self-care is often the first thing to get neglected. But when you have ADHD, maintaining your mental health is crucial to staying productive and focused. Overloading your schedule without taking care of your body and mind can lead to burnout.
Make time for regular breaks, exercise, and activities that bring you joy—whether that’s reading, meditation, or simply taking a walk outside. Don’t forget to maintain your regular ADHD routines, such as using medication or therapy techniques, to help you manage symptoms.
Tip: Incorporate “holiday self-care” into your schedule. Whether it’s a 10-minute morning meditation or an evening hot bath, these little moments of rest can help reset your brain and recharge your energy.
Be Kind to Yourself
Finally, remember that you’re doing your best, and it’s okay if things don’t go perfectly. The holidays can bring up unrealistic expectations, but the reality is that we all have limits—especially when ADHD is in the mix. It’s important to practice self-compassion, forgive yourself when things don’t go as planned, and embrace the chaos with a sense of humor.
The holiday season is about connection, not perfection. So if you miss a deadline, forget to send a card, or need to scale back your plans, that’s okay. What matters most is enjoying the moments that matter most to you.
Final Thoughts
Managing the extra to-dos around the holidays with ADHD requires planning, patience, and, most importantly, self-compassion. By breaking down tasks, simplifying where you can, and asking for help, you can reduce the pressure and stress that often accompany the season. The key is to stay organized, be mindful of your energy, and, above all, give yourself grace.
Remember: the holiday season isn’t about doing everything perfectly—it's about making memories and enjoying the moments that bring you joy. So take a deep breath, focus on what truly matters, and allow yourself to celebrate without the weight of a never-ending to-do list on your shoulders.
Happy holidays!